No, this is not a movie about Reggae.

Typically I believe that God never gives me more than I can handle. Although frequently when I screw up I receive warnings. I don't know what ill-advised course my life took to arrive at Mon Star but it must have been something that REALLY made him angry. This movie would be my punishment for offending him, however believing that he is indeed merciful is evidenced by the fact that the movie is only ten minutes long.

Mon Star comes from the brain of independent filmmaker Glen Abbott out of Orlando Florida who's would-be genius has thrust upon us this bizarre rock and roll musical (yes, rock and roll musical) about a crazy scientist who creates a creature who goes nuts and stomps the city flat and, needless to say, becomes target practice for our military.

The design of the creature is . . . uh . . . well see for yourself:

Sorry you had to see that.

Not only does he look profoundly disgusting, not only does he sing but he does so without speaking ENGLISH! What we hear is "Blahh Blahh Blahh" with subtitles! Now, being ten minutes long the movie doesn't stop to have musical numbers, no, we are inundated with musical number WHILE the military pelts the ass-beast with bullets!

The movie frequently returns to the scientist who mourns his gluteus masterpiece by also breaking into song. Watching his lips move it's apparent that he didn't have the singing chops to do his own voice work, but judging by his replacement I can't imagine how much worse his natural voice could possibly have been.

Either Mon Star is some kind of masterpiece or I have found the doorway to movie Hell. This movie is so awful that I think if it were 15 minutes long my head would have exploded. Typically in a movie this bad, this is where I begin complaining about the precious moments stolen from my life. Being that Mon Star is only 10 minutes long should I complain about only losing that much precious time? In the case of a movie featuring a singing, subtitled ass-monster I think a complaint would be very justifyed.